The first evening, I noticed it flying around in a dozy, drunken kind of way. It nearly drowned in our aquarium but the mesh to stop the fish jumping out saved it.
I am not very frightened of insects, over the course of my lifetime and eight (? I think) homes, I have rescued many bees, wasps, daddy long legs, moths and spiders alike, transporting them back to the great outdoors by way of a glass and sturdy piece of card.
The only things I do not save are house flies. If they make life easy and buzz around a window, I'll let them out that way. House flies carry campylobacter; food poisoning laid me so low for 9 long days a few years ago, I cannot suffer flies to live and so swat them without compunction.
Anyway, back to the wasp, it damply flew up to the ceiling, banged itself on a beam and then dropped like a stone behind our sofa. I tried to locate it but it was nowhere to be seen. 🐝
As long as it didn't get in our bedroom, I decided I could live with it spending the night in the lounge, I'd try to find it in the morning.
The next day was really nice, cold but sunny, MTM doesn't work on Fridays so we wrapped up warm and had a daytrip to the seaside (Sutton on Sea).
We had a lovely lunch at the Beach Bar with a glass of cider, cup of tea to wash it down and then we had a lovely walk up to and beyond Sandilands.
The National Trust is doing a fabulous job of converting a golf course into a wetland nature reserve.
I forgot all about the wasp.
We went to bed after the 10 o'clock news that night, tired out by all the fresh air and fun. I was just about to turn the light off when I spotted the wasp flitting about the Velux windows on the sloping ceiling. It had clearly been awoken by the heating, it really needs to be somewhere cold. Sighing, I collected my glass and card from the lounge where I'd left them the night before.
The dratted creature did exactly the same as the day before, flew up to the vaulted ceiling, reached the apex beam, plunged in a headlong dive behind my bedside table and then did the same disappearing act. I became annoyed and agitated, pulling out the cabinet, moving things around under the bed trying to find it.
MTM: Just turn the light off, it will go to sleep.
Me: I can't sleep with it in here, especially on my side.
MTM: I'll swap sides with you.
Me: It might crawl into our mouths, sting us, our throats will close up with swelling. We'd be dead before an ambulance ever arrived to give us a tracheotomy.
MTM : You sleep with your mouth closed ..... remember? Because of spiders? (I read somewhere that the average person eats 8 spiders in a lifetime this way).
Me: I can't take the risk, we'll have to sleep in the guest room.
MTM: I'm staying here
So I reluctantly headed to the guest bedroom, taking a loving, last look at my husband who would - I was certain - die in the night.
Saturday morning arrived, I was surprised to find all was well, the first thing MTM said to me was "Bzzzzzzzzz"! You can perhaps understand why his nickname is Micky Taking Monster. We had a cup of tea in bed, did a crossword together and then started to get on with our day. After showering in our ensuite bathroom, I was halfway through applying my Merwave products to my dripping wet hair (you get better waves if hair is really wet) when ....
I reached for one of the products but *there* was the same gigantic wasp crawling around the base of one of the bottles. I swore profusely, leapt naked into the bedroom to retrieve my glass and card, dripping water and product all over the hardwood floor. I was mad as heck, once I caught it, this wasp was going to die, no more Mrs Nice Guy.
When I got back, the wasp had disappeared ... again! It had possibly dropped down onto the floor and crawled into the laundry basket. 🧺
I had to finish my hair nervously glancing around all the time, watching where I trod in case it was on the floor.
After getting dressed and putting on my makeup, I left the wasp in the ensuite bathroom with the door shut but there is probably enough room underneath for it to crawl out.
I have shaken out every item in the laundry basket, looked under the mats but it's nowhere to be seen.
Now I can only wait in nervous anticipation for its next appearance!
